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Re: I acted on a fantasy in therapy » Dinah

Posted by workinprogress on December 20, 2009, at 1:57:48

In reply to Re: I acted on a fantasy in therapy » workinprogress, posted by Dinah on December 19, 2009, at 8:07:11

Dinah,

Awesome, I'm so glad it fit for you. It's a subject that I've been giving a lot of thought and therapy time to lately, so it was on my mind. I've been worried about my therapist not connecting to me as much- worrying that something in our relationship, how she feels about me has changed. In reality, it's me projecting my fear and/or not connecting to her. We're still sorting through it, but it's been a really fruitful conversation.

And yeah, probably the stroking of the hair wouldn't be appropriate. I have a little fantasy of laying my head in my T's lap in the same way, like a kid would curled up next to you on the couch... complete with hair stroking. I guess there's something really tender and loving about that.

Still super impressed you did it though. Probably was good for both of you!

WIP

> Now you see, that's what my therapist loves about Babble.
>
> I wasn't thinking in that direction at all, but as soon as you said it I realized that you were right.
>
> I'm not letting him off the hook for not being there or anything. But related to my post above, I have been in my head an awful lot, and I noticed myself that the session had become a recitation of the week's events. What suddenly came back to me is that I was not at all connected to *him* and some of the things he said in session had indicated he realized that.
>
> Maybe the impulsive acting out of a fantasy I'd already described to him was my way of getting his focus and my focus recentered.
>
> The fantasy isn't always about telling him to focus on me. Sometimes it's about sitting at his feet and laying my head against his knee. Maybe having him lightly stroke my hair. Obviously that one I won't act out because I'm way too old for my head to be at the proper height. :) And I'm reasonably sure he wouldn't consider it appropriate to stroke my hair.

 

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