Posted by antigua3 on May 14, 2009, at 19:51:03
In reply to How It Went, posted by Daisym on May 13, 2009, at 20:29:00
It sounds like your session went pretty well, but it was still terribly painful.
I'm glad you spoke up and he acknowledged how you are feeling and that he understands and wants to continue working and helping you in any way you need him.
I get the manipulation part. For me, I am still getting over that the abuse was all my fault--that I caused it, and manipulation on my part was an important factor, or so I thought. So it's easy for me to see why manipulation would be a really important issue. Explore it some more because it's triggering you.
It's easy to say we know it wasn't our fault; it's another to feel it. But we can do it. I'm doing it now in my own therapy. It's more than accepting. It's feeling it and integrating it into who we are. It's not happening the way I thought, as in "I'll get over it and move on," but it's really integrating the feelings, thoughts and beliefs about myself into becoming a new person. Being reborn is how my pdoc puts it, and I like that metaphor. Becoming a new person in a way, while still holding onto the core of my being, and soul, that I believe is good and strong.
Give yourself a break tonight and focus on comfort until you gather some strength. We always struggle so hard, and it's such an effort, but sometimes we just need to recharge.
antigua
poster:antigua3
thread:895460
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090421/msgs/895830.html