Posted by Partlycloudy on December 17, 2008, at 6:53:54
In reply to Re: Evenings are the worst » Partlycloudy, posted by Daisym on December 16, 2008, at 23:39:30
> Sometimes we are forced to go through that which we avoided previously. Having been molested, there should have been this same kind of numbness and pain - both psychologically and physically. You are feeling the shock all over again. Perhaps you did some of this back then, but more likely you stuffed it away, you conquered your fear by focusing on keeping the secret. Now that the secret is taking less energy - your psyche can open up to all these feelings.
>When it happened, I immediately minimized that anything had happened at all - it was all my fault, I hid in my room, and sang at the top of my lungs. It never happened, but I changed overnight.
Now the pain is front and center. The panic and anxiety is as full and strong as the depression is. I am still having to check in with my T every day. (What will I have to tell her today?)
> You will get through this - you have to keep reminding yourself that you lived through the worst of it - when it happened before. But you also have to be gentle and take care of yourself - it sounds like you are doing that. It is like recovering from a long illness - you can only do so much each day. Evening is always worse when we are scared and tired and not feeling well. Especially after therapy. My son calls it therapy-hangover.
>
> Remember to drink lots of hot tea, take your vitamins and sleep as much as possible. I hope Santa brings you something special.
My T says I'm doing a remarkable job of taking care of myself (with listening to my body, taking supplements, trying the yoga stuff). It has finally, FINALLY sunk in that I am the only person who is going to be doing the tending here. No one else can do this but me.It's awfully lonely in here, even with a spouse.
thanks Daisy.
poster:Partlycloudy
thread:869147
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081205/msgs/869213.html