Posted by Wittgensteinz on November 23, 2008, at 3:26:29
In reply to Re: Feeling at peace again » Wittgensteinz, posted by Dinah on November 22, 2008, at 23:41:30
Thanks Dinah,
I felt it was him caring - it was nothing huge or spectacular but it came as a little warmth in a bit of a dark period.I'm glad you were still able to see and feel your dad's love toward you despite his exterior. My mother, I can't say she loves me - my father does but he is a very distant person - he has never been able to embrace me (physically or emotionally). His way of showing he cared was often in the form of a 'rain coat' - I remember as a student him going on at me for ages about having lights on my bike. However, I could be in the kitchen with him and accidentally pour boiling water over my hand while making tea and yelping and he would not even notice - or as happened on one occasion, I jumped and smacked my head hard on a wooden beam, concussing myself and he was sitting there in the same room as I rolled about on the floor, head clutched in hands and he hadn't even noticed!
Thank goodness my therapist is a little more warm and attentive than my father - small doses of warm fuzzies help but if I would arrive one day to find him dressed as a cuddly pink rabbit, I probably wouldn't know what to do. I told him the other day how my partner's therapist (he saw a lady a handful of times to help process the grief at the loss of his father) had candles burning in her office and always made tea or coffee for him at the beginning of each session. I think his eyes almost popped out of his head - "Oh... really she did?! I couldn't be doing with all that!"
Witti
poster:Wittgensteinz
thread:864765
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081120/msgs/864818.html