Posted by DAisym on October 16, 2008, at 13:39:02
Sometimes there are just those moments during a session when everything freezes and the exact right thing gets said.
I was mad at my therapist all weekend. I'm struggling with my divorce and he wanted me to stay in my adult-self to deal with things. He was trying to be protective. My younger parts, which have been out a lot, felt sent away. I was hurt. My pride told me I was being stupid, of course I have to be an adult to deal with a divorce. And therapy isn't all tea and sympathy - he wouldn't do me any good if he didn't say what I didn't want to hear.
So Monday I told him I was "all done" with the stories and the tears. I said it felt like it was over and it felt good. It was such a relief. He said, "really, seems pretty fast. Did I upset you some how or give you the idea I didn't want to hear anymore?" I said no. But I shut down and spent most of the session in silence.
Tuesday I opened up and told him off. We worked on what he missed and what I didn't say and why. He admitted that my ex pushes his buttons "he is so mean to you" and that he needs to watch himself around this. There was a lot of back and forth, but we were working through it.
Right before I left, I said, "I lied to you yesterday. I'm not really done with the stories and my younger parts have not gone away." He smiled and very gently said, "I knew that. I could feel them still."
It was the exact right thing to say.
poster:DAisym
thread:857752
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081005/msgs/857752.html