Posted by Daisym on September 28, 2008, at 0:15:53
In reply to Do you think your T really .....?, posted by JayMac on September 27, 2008, at 15:40:24
Yes, I think my therapist knows me. But I've been seeing him for over 5 years and I see him 4x a week. I think the frequency allows us to get past all the catch up stuff and really talk. But it also means I can share work stuff and kid stuff as well as trauma stuff and divorce stuff because there is time to do that.
I'm hard to get to know too - what people think they know about me is mostly not true. But my therapist seems to really want to know me - and not just all the bad stuff. He asks these questions, and at first I think, "what?!" But then I realize it is just another piece of me. He wanted to know my favorite book and he supports my habit of shoe shopping. He knows (and has met) my safety object (a stuffed animal) and we talk about being Catholic (he is Jewish) and God and fate and spirits and other out there stuff.
Allowing someone to know you, the intimacy that takes, is a very scary thing. It takes time to trust someone, as it should. This is actually very adaptive of you - rushing things won't help. It sounds like you are doing exactly what you should be at this phase. I'm glad you are working with someone to whom you feel you can attach. I can't help but wonder what you imagine it will feel like/look like when you are "fully attached." Because I tend to think that we attach and reattach over and over again. It is the nature of relationships.
poster:Daisym
thread:854410
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/854548.html