Posted by Nadezda on August 10, 2008, at 9:41:47
In reply to Re: Abrupt termination because of strong transference., posted by Cal on August 10, 2008, at 7:21:05
Honestly IMO he was completely out of line having his wife come to his office in that way. I'm glad you've found him so helpful, but he obviously has some glaring deficiencies in his training if he thinks that's an ordinary, acceptable thing. Some types of training don't emphasize that keeping boundaries is important-- but it really is. I'd have freaked out if I had to see my T's wife-- or if I saw her now.
And to drop you precipitously from therapy is really awful. Like Cal said-- this is how he thinks you deal with a crisis? --- that's how he solves problems?
I don't know what you said in your message-- or where you left it-- I mean maybe there are things that you left out that further explain his being emotionally out of control-- But that's not how you respond to a patient's being upset with you-- a good T knows that this is a thing that happens a lot in therapy.
He certainly needed to help you find another T, if his limitations prevent him from working with you. It's very wrong not to give you referrals and to support you through the transition. And he told you this on the phone? I'm sorry-- but that's just totally wrong. He needs to get some supervision, if this is how he handles things when his countertransference gets intense.
I feel really really bad for you, nebulae. Maybe you can go to someone on a consultation basis, and see if they can help you reconnect with this T-- since you seem to think you've gotten a lot of help from him. But he certainly has some flaws as a T-- that need to be addressed by him.
Nadezda
poster:Nadezda
thread:845212
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080810/msgs/845298.html