Posted by Quintal on August 9, 2008, at 21:02:48
In reply to Re: T doesn't think I have BPD or Asperger's, posted by Sigismund on August 9, 2008, at 19:56:16
>There must be something I don't understand.
Maybe, but what do you really mean here?
>If you feel detached from people, why would you feel disoriented in social situations?
I don't see any conflict between the two.
>I can never work out who is caring about whatever it is....is it me, is it someone else, is it both, is it me in them, is it them in me??
I don't have any difficulty in figuring people out. The problem is I find I have nothing to say when it comes to that meaningless 'talking about nothing' chatter. I just can't work out what I'm supposed to say. It sounds to me like people making empty noise just for the sake of it - for distraction, and that's what I find very 'disorientating'. I actually get physically dizzy sometimes, like vertigo. I don't know where I'm at or where I'm going, and that's unusual for me.
I have no problem when it comes to conveying logical, factual information - it's this open ended 'just to be sociable' stuff that has me lost. Like "What are you having for tea?", "What did you do at the weekend?" or "How are you?" I used to reply with an honest literal response to these questions, but I can tell from their reactions this isn't what people want when they ask the question, so what do they want? I don't know. Just a bit of noise.
>Open ended social settings suck (you might say) because the onus is on you to know what you want (other than to get away). But structured social settings can too.
It's easy to predict what will happen in structured seetings, so I can plan responses in advance. Soical settings are a complete blank. It's like a multiple choice exam (where even if you don't know the answer you can make an educated guess by a process of elimination) versus an open ended question with a blank page staring back at you.
Q
poster:Quintal
thread:845220
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080727/msgs/845237.html