Posted by seldomseen on February 7, 2008, at 3:51:24
In reply to Re: Anyone seen InTreatment? (transference issues) » Daisym, posted by seldomseen on February 7, 2008, at 2:34:11
Okay, I think I am ready to talk about this now.
I also don't think Paul should have let Laura get away with saying that she was only going to marry her boyfriend because Paul wasn't going to be with her.
To me, that is emotional blackmail and if I had done anything like that, my T would've called me out on it. But Laura is a very smart woman and I suspect that Paul is going to have his hands full dealing with her.
I think it is very telling that Paul's counselor asked Paul if he thought that falling Laura's falling in love with him was necessary for her healing.
I don't know how valid that statement is as far as psychological theory, but I think it is true for some patients - at least it was for me. It was necessary step for me in my recovery to be able to feel love for someone and be treated with respect and kindess in return.
I'm also coming to terms with the fact that psychiatrists use the term transference to refer to the feelings that develop in the therapy room. It used to really bother me and I would feel very minimized by it. But I think it is necessary for the therapist to label it as such in order to keep themselves out of the fray of emotions and remain a witness.
Ultimately, I think therapy has got to remain about the patient/client and I do think the therapist has got to remain a neutral soundingboard for us. As much as we may try to bring them personally into our therapy, the focus has got to stay on us. As much as possible they've got stay out of it.
I see this very clearly illustrated in Paul's final remarks to Laura in which she asked him point blank "do you want me". Paul interjected himself right into that question and said "No". In doing so he made that therapeutic moment about his desires and wants and took Laura, his client right out of the picture.
It will be very interesting, albeit difficult to watch to see how he handles the situation with her next week.
Seldom
poster:seldomseen
thread:810508
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080126/msgs/811230.html