Posted by seldomseen on January 24, 2008, at 12:07:50
In reply to Re: Question - Abbie » obsidian, posted by AbbieNormal on January 24, 2008, at 6:10:56
I'm not sure you will ever find the answer that you are looking for in terms of some sort of universal causality.
I think the reasons these feelings develop for our therapists are unique to the individual.
I think the pain we feel is because we want something - but we are not going to get it.
And, for some of us that may be a very old and very familiar kind of feeling, but it still hurt.
So, what I began to do was to ask myself and my therapist - what exactly did I want from my therapist and then, why did I want it?
Sometimes those answers were not easy to come by, and there was multiple answers for me.
But it required that I step out of the pain and began to think analytically about myself, which is, IMO, the essence of therapy.
I think what is truly therapeutic (and as is often the case - painful) is the wanting and the examination of it.
However, for me, there wasn't a big AHA! moment and in that instant everything magically resolved. It's a process to go through.
In the end, it all had meaning - and still does to this day.
I'm sorry you're hurting. I know what it feels like. But I think the key to explaining it is to examine the hurt itself.
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:808642
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080114/msgs/808724.html