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Re: fitting in » Dory

Posted by muffled on September 18, 2007, at 19:39:24

In reply to Re: fitting in » muffled, posted by Dory on September 18, 2007, at 17:45:19

> i know i don't fit it...but it's not just here. i don't really fit in anywhere. i haven't been here as long as a few of you have, but i have been here almost 8months and i don't see a lot of forgiveness. i stay off all the other boards because i find the tension intolerable sometimes.

** this is definately my fav board...

> i see people "get over it" maybe? pretend it never happened? or maybe there is more of that stuff beind the scenes?

**I mean more along the line of acceptance. Accepting the others are going to have thier 'moments', and maybe say things best left unsaid. But accepting that they got their own 'stuff' that drives them, just as I have my own 'stuff' that drives me, *and* drives my perception of others.
I find with just the written word its especially hard to perceive things correctly everytime, and misunderstandings occur.
But what I say to myself, is that that person hurts too. That person wants to feel included too. That person wants to be accepted for who they are too. Just like me....and so, in most instances I am inclined to give others the benefit of the doubt and take the stance that they meant no harm.

> i don't recall anyone apologizing to me for hurtful things said. That is ok, i don't expect it, like i said to you in chat once, i don't see everyone here as being friends or family. Sure i made some online friends here, but i post here for input/feedback and sharing... i give support and i get support most of the time. i try not to think of it as anything else or it would be very stressful. i don't want any of my energy poured into an "issue" with a stranger.

**that sounds good. I think babble is different things to different people at different times....Sometimes I post alot, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I'm helpful, sometimes I'm an *ss, it varies.
>
> i like to call horseshit by it's real name but for the sake of civility i don't... which means i don't say anything sometimes. Sometimes i can't be supportive for my own reasons, or have nothing to add.

**Thats good that you hold yourself back, cuz this is meant to be a place of support as much as possible. Support about stuff the average joe may not 'get', and about stuff thats not exactly general coffehouse light talk.

> i think you're a great community member Muffled. But not everyone is or can be all the time... it's always going to be a mixed bag. People who are arogant, people who are submissive, people who are angry, people who are sad... sshit, it's a wonder we can get along at all IMO.

**Thanks! I do try. Yup, thats what I like, its a mixed bag, AND what with some of the issues here it can be truly something at times!!! I know I seem to go off my nut at regular intervals, though less often and more 'civilly' now!!!!

> (oh, and btw - F-A-R-T!)

**LOL!!! whatch it, Bobs gonna get ya!
Alls I would say to you Dory, is do what YOU are able to do here. It CAN be a good place to learn how to interact...
It CAN be hard.
But I still hold with my thot, that, by and large, people here are more accepting than other places I have been.
So I hope you can work it out Dory, and be here as safely as you can. If you cannot be here now, maybe you can be somewhere down the road.
I truly wish you the best.
Muffled

 

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