Posted by Racer on September 4, 2007, at 11:51:50
In reply to once i close my eyes a new reality..., posted by rjlockhart on September 4, 2007, at 0:29:37
I don't think I've ever heard you tell why you don't see a therapist? You've posted things similar to this before, where you say that you need help to sort all this out, but you've never mentioned why you don't find a therapist to help you with it. Can you tell us a bit more about that?
If it's a question of money, there are counselors at most schools. They may not be ready to go quite so in depth as some of the private therapists out there, but it's still better than nothing.
Here's the thing: while it's possible to do some self-exploration on your own, you're still only going to have your own -- possibly warped -- perspective and interpretations to work off of. That's the value of having a therapist: having another perspective, which can help you see things a different way. You have been here a long time, and you know that I've answered a lot of what you have to say -- maybe consider that a sign of caring about you? -- so I know you as well as anyone can from your postings. You've written a lot about what's going on in your head, and in your life, but I haven't seen a lot of change in that time. There has been some change, and that's good, but I think you've gotten into a bit of a rut as far as perspective goes. That's certainly not a criticism -- I have a rut so deep in my perspective that even with my therapist it's hard to get out of it. It's a normal part of being human -- we see out of our own eyes, so we see the same perspective unless someone or something outside ourselves brings a new perspective to our attention. That's what a therapist does.
I do care what happens to you, I care how you feel, and I care that you find a more adaptive way to relate to the world around you. You've got it tough in some ways, but you've also got the raw materials to improve things. Why not get some help with that, and save yourself some time and some suffering?
Way back when I was young -- and that's somewhere before the last ice age -- I was pretty sure I could see everything clearly, and knew what I needed to do, and could do it all myself. HA! Therapy pretty literally saved my life, and if I'd gotten help sooner, I'd have been saved many, many years of abject misery. The problems that I needed help with grew, and grew, and grew until I just could not cope.
What I didn't know then, and know now, is that allowing those problems to grow made them so integral to my life that it's possible that I'll never get over the practical effects they had on me. If I had gotten help back when I was your age, I might not have wasted most of my adult life. So, I type responses to you, and to some others here, hoping you can avoid the mistakes I made.
It's up to you, you have options open to you now that may not be there in a few years. I very much hope you do choose to take action now, rather than waiting until it's too late, as I did.
poster:Racer
thread:780717
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070904/msgs/780771.html