Posted by madeline on April 8, 2007, at 18:37:58
In reply to tomorrow's the day but i am ticked off **trigger**, posted by gazo on April 8, 2007, at 17:10:03
I've actually thought about this a lot.
I'm a seasoned veteran of therapy and, like you, one of the first things I did was read a bunch of stuff about theories behind therapy.
Then for months I hated my psychiatrist (but for some reason kept going - I think just to tell him that I hated him and his entire profession).
He just listened, challenged me when I made it personal, but primarily just listened.
I threw everything at him but the kitchen sink.
Well, it finally ran its course - then I realized that I loved him and started hating him for that and that finally ran its course. Then finally, I got to work.
Look, therapy is tough, and the relationship we develop with our therapist is complicated and the stuff we talk about in therapy is tough.
I think, and this is based solely on your posts - that's all I have, is that you are afraid. Your last "therapeutic alliance" (what the heck is that anyway?) didn't end well and naturally you are apprehensive about entering into another one. It's okay. Take your concerns to this new guy (if you want to) and just see what he says.
IMO, he shouldn't try to defend any of the theories as the absolute truth, but rather should just listen to what YOU have to say about them.
When it comes down to it, WE do the work of therapy and NOT the therapist. WE are the ones that have to grieve, process all that crap, deal with the "transference" issues, pay the money etc...
Yeah some therapists aren't so hot (man, do I have some stories), but they don't control our recovery - they are simply the coach IMO.
All I can say is, when all of my tears have reached the sea, I will still view therapy as magic and my therapist a magician. But in reality, he didn't do all that much.
poster:madeline
thread:748171
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070406/msgs/748195.html