Posted by widget on February 22, 2007, at 16:50:51
I have had an erotic transference toward my male therapist (I am female) for about 8 months. I told him about it 6 months ago. He is very kind and ethical about boundaries. Somehow, I guess it was a fantasy, I was convinced that at least he had a countertransference involving sexual interest in me, at least at the unconscious level. I finally discussed this with him today. He told me he had never thought of me in that way. I understand the boundary rules and his devotion to his wife and family. I did not expect that we would act on that; he made his views on that perfectly clear. In reading the pschological/psychiatric literature, I found much support for the presence of an erotic countertransference by the therapist when confronted with an erotic transference by the client. I even gave him a copy of the article! I guess I was trying to "prove" to him that he had some sexual feelings for me. And, that would have been enough for me. It would have made me feel desirable and lovable. I am still shocked that he doesn't feel this way toward me. It's amazing because others have been attracted to me with far less reason. Again, he is very kind but what a rejection! I guess I cannot make someone desire me if that it is not there. Totally rejected; he says he will be able to help me learn to validate myself which is just no help at all right now. Of course, that is the purpose of therapy but that's my head talking not my heart. Broken hearted again. How could he resist me?ll
Thanks
poster:widget
thread:735148
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070215/msgs/735148.html