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Re: being attached is hard » Dinah

Posted by sunnydays on January 5, 2007, at 14:43:38

In reply to Re: being attached is hard » sunnydays, posted by Dinah on January 5, 2007, at 10:08:38

> It *is* hard. But it is also healing in a way. It helps open us up to being attached to others who might be able to return our attachment in equal measure.

**** Yeah, I'm hoping I'll find someone like that sometime.

>
> It also does get better. Like love, attachment hurts the most in the earlier headier stages, and settles down to calm attachment as you feel more and more safe and secure in the attachment.

**** Yeah. It seems to come and go in waves for me. At times it's really intense and painful, and at other times it is really nice and calm. It just depends what I'm worrying about, for the most part.

>
> Oh, I just remembered something. It doesn't get completely better, because my therapist was angry at me just the other day because of my incessant need for reassurance. But he was in a rotten mood that day, and yelling at me about everything, and he's been rather repentant and reassuring since then. He's even, without prompting, brought up his caring for me a few times.
>
> Gosh, I'd forgotten that he had gotten angry with me about that. I was wondering why he kept bringing up his caring for me.


**** Maybe because he cares about you? It might not all be that he wanted to make up for being mad. Although, my therapist also tends to remember things he did that hurt me and try to make up for them much longer than they bother me or I remember them.

sunnydays


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poster:sunnydays thread:719427
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070103/msgs/719629.html