Posted by Daisym on November 15, 2006, at 0:38:25
In reply to I think the Real Work has started CAbu triggers*, posted by Lindenblüte on November 14, 2006, at 22:49:55
I keep an extra makeup kit in my car now. And I invested in some good waterproof mascara. Doesn't help with the runny nose though. I'm sure she has seen lots worse than smudged mascara. No worries there.
Does your mom already know about the abuse? Have you talked about it before, in anyway?
I have the exact same concerns you do. I also have this whole other scenario in my head too - I tell her and she says, "Oh honey. I'm so sorry that happened to you. But it was a long time ago. You are a smart, strong woman and look how well you've done despite this. So there is no need to dwell on any of that. Let it go. Move forward." These would be wise words too, if only it were that simple. But then the bind would be about needing therapy around all of this, instead of doing well inspite of it.
So I haven't told her. For lots of reasons. And my therapist and I have talked about this a million times. He doesn't believe it HAS to be the next step in healing, just like I don't have to figure out how to forgive my father. I think some people really believe that this is an important part of the journey but I think you have to be really ready for that step and you are awfully new to talking about all of this. So think about it carefully and go slow.
I'm not convinced yet that telling your whole family is always beneficial. So don't let anyone push you into anything. Walk your own path.
poster:Daisym
thread:703546
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061109/msgs/703573.html