Posted by Daisym on September 25, 2006, at 23:32:59
In reply to Sorry for disappearing (very long), posted by wishingstar on September 25, 2006, at 22:50:37
There is this "secret" that no one really talks about and that is that suicidal feelings ease off, but don't really completely go away for a long time. I've come to think of them as the escape hatch - and once suicide as an option ever gets on the table, it is incredibly hard to get off. Because it is the ultimate escape.
So you have to fight back, sometimes harder than others. And I think everything is pretty much fair game. Like disappointing Randy. I can imagine he would be pretty devasted if you hurt yourself or worse, after completing the program. Of course he doesn't expect you to be fully better. But he is hoping you will fight back.
All that said, things do seem very hard and overwhelming. Can you drop at least one class this quarter? Ease up on yourself and make it up later? Keep remembering the big picture - 5 years from now, who knows how you will feel? So, go slow and be gentle with yourself.
And laugh. Try to find things that make you laugh - because suicidal thoughts hate laughter. Watch a funny movie, read a comic book. But laugh.
Take good care,
Daisy
poster:Daisym
thread:689266
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060911/msgs/689271.html