Posted by james K on August 24, 2006, at 14:53:05
In reply to Re: my t, posted by Estella on August 24, 2006, at 3:13:02
Hi Estalla.
A lot of this reminded me of some things that I've been through. I don't want to confuse the issue with bringing up new ideas, but it really struck me. First off, I think you need to be with people right for your history and issues and these may not be them.
When I was in the clinic earlier this year, I knew I was in the best place there was. I knew and agreed with these doctors' and counselors' philosophy and approach. But I still was second guessing them. Every question I tried to find the right answer and then to have the solution to the problem that my answer exposed. Finally my individual therapist got me to look at it like "Would you take your car to the mechanic, give him the diagnosis, then chastise yourself for not having fixed it already?, so why are you doing it in you mental and physical health?." I wish I could have worked with him longer.
There is a real danger with those of us who maybe have high IQ's and have done research to give our providers what we think they want in order to get what we think we need. I felt when you talked about going to a GP, I recognized that attitude.
It is hard when our brains can go down so many different avenues and our problems are deep and longstanding to find professionals willing and able to keep up.
I think for a therapist and a pdoc, you are going to have to find someone that is your equal and right for your issues, then trust. It doesn't sound like you've found that person yet, but watch out for yourself when you do.
I hope I'm not putting too much of my issues on your situation. I was just reminded of some things that might happen to me, or I would say. I was having sessions where my T would ask a question, I would think for a minute, have a mini-breakthough, encapsulate it in a sentence, then beat up on myself for not working that out or acting on it earlier. Then my psych would mention a drug, and I would explain why its side-effects didn't fit my desire, and my philosopy against that kind of med etc. on and on.
I'm so glad you're getting therapy at all right now. I hope you find the way to make it work.your friend,
james k
poster:james K
thread:679557
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060808/msgs/679673.html