Posted by ElaineM on July 16, 2006, at 11:15:13
In reply to Love and Affection, posted by orchid on July 16, 2006, at 2:29:46
Orchid: I agree. But I do think that some modes of therapy do not lend themselves to the "relationship" (as Dinah said). Like, short-term CBT, or something like that.
Yet, I think love or caring, is very important, because I assume clients are coming to therapy with someone old, underlying hurt. And I don't know of anything else but love, to heal the wounds of sadness or hate -- Whether it's completely making up for, or re-writing of earlier experiences, or even if it's just gaining the ability to accept another's caring view of yourself. As though continually feeling care coming from your T, you can change "My T 'loves' me. My T 'loves' me....", to "Maybe I love myself too" (or something like that). As though love is contageous.
I know this is only me, but when I was in treatment for the ED, I saw a ton of relapses, but the success stories all had a similar theme -- they got pregnant or married. Some greater love seemed to pull them through -- one more powerful then their self-hate. Obviously, it's not the same for everyone. I know that happily married mothers can still have eating disorders, I only mean to suggest that a deficit of Love seems to be so significant to someone's progress or continued suffering - whatever their issues are.....But this is only what I've witnessed myself.(I don't want to offend anyone with a diff exp.)
Okay, I'll stop. I worry I'm sounding like a cheesy greeting card, or something. All I know is that that "loved" feeling I felt from my last T, and my doctor, helped me so much more that all the educational lectures, or meds combined. It made me feel that maybe I was a human after all.
The thing I wonder is, Do you think it ever matters what gender the (platonic) "love" sender is? Like, I've always wondered if I could feel the same type of caring from a male T.(I'm even more skeptical now) Have you ever felt equally cared for by a male and female T? Just curious.
EL
poster:ElaineM
thread:667430
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060703/msgs/667481.html