Posted by pegasus on June 22, 2006, at 13:02:37
In reply to I really think pregnancy isn't the time to do this » B2chica, posted by orchid on June 22, 2006, at 12:13:18
You know, I don't necessarily agree with this. Orchid, I know you are saying it from a beautifully caring place. And yes, the mother's emotions do get translated in some form to the child. And it would be great if all pregnant women could be in a state of bliss throughout their pregnancy without repressing any big issues. But in the real world, there sometimes are issues that come up, and we can't always control when. My experience was that some issues came up *because* I was pregnant, and it was really helpful to deal with them to some extent before the baby came, so they didn't get in the way of my mothering. Even though that definitely stirred up a lot of pain during my pregnancy.
Being a mom is so challenging, and we bring to it all of the stuff that we bring to every effort in our lives, good and bad. Kids are emotionally connected to their moms throughout their childhoods. You can't repress all important issues until the kids are grown up, without sacrificing your own mental health. If you try, things are going to pop out in unexpected and unintended ways. And maybe in some ways, being ok with feeling our feelings, even extreme ones, can be good mothering.
Peg
poster:pegasus
thread:660107
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/660162.html