Posted by canadagirl on May 19, 2006, at 16:54:31
In reply to cognitive dissonance, posted by llrrrpp on May 19, 2006, at 15:47:18
As someone who struggles with this...loads of negativity and self limiting beliefs....and has a job where I have to appear competent to the outside world no matter what I am thinking inside...the "homework" you might want to think about is this. Countering the negative self talk with positive, supportive statements. Sounds easier said than done. But it does work. You can weaken the hold on your negative self statements by exposing them.
1. Relax. Disrupt the train of negativity.
2. Write down the negative self talk. The act of writing down will help you disentangle thoughts from feelings. Even though you state you don't "feel" them. Think back at what you were telling yourself. Separate the thoughts from the resulting feelings. Ask what thoughts led you to feel the way you did. After you've determined what you were saying to yourself, rate your degree of belief in it from 0 - 100.
3. Identify the type of negative self talk (is it from the worrier, critic, victim or perfectionist?)
3. Answer or dispute your negative self talk with positive, rational, supportive statements. Challenge the distortions. You should feel comfortable with these statements. Think about how you could take a constructive self supportive outlook and write statements that reverse your negative thoughts. Use questions if necessary to challenge them. E.g., what is the evidence for this? Is this always true? Has it been true in the past? What are the odds of this really being true now? Am I looking at the whole picture? Am I being fully objective?Then rerate your degree of belief in the negative self talk from 0 -100.
Hope this helps...the act of actually WRITING DOWN I found really helps. So don't just think about it, write it down too. Let me know if it works for you. As you can see, I am an expert in negativity. I have an advanced degree in my very own university of negative thinking. LOL
good luck.
poster:canadagirl
thread:645964
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060517/msgs/646000.html