Posted by B2chica on April 17, 2006, at 13:44:25
terrible embarrassed of dream last night.
although it left me feeling Wonderful (smile)while seeing my ex T i never had any sexual dreams about him, though i was attracted to him, it wasn't in a sexual way.
but i think last nights dream made up for ALL those months that i didn't dream this way about him.
my dream was that my old T came back to town and met up with me. we got along Great outside those four walls, we talked about our jobs, movies, ideas. well we ended up innocently at his hotel (to pick something up...really) but i followed him to his room. we had a glass of wine and talked about art and passion and needs and desires and great...GREAT passion came from this! it was so real, that i still feel it. physically and emotionally...yes it was THAT GOOD! we were consumed!he held me, caressed me, ME the real me, not what i show everyone else. also...well, in my dream i secretly wanted us to have unprotected sex so that he could get me pregnant cuz my hubby couldn't...
i didn't tell him that and we did...and i left his hotel room before he woke up and i wrote him a letter saying that he gave me something i've needed and wanted for a long time, that he'll never know what that night has meant to me and that i know i will never see him again and it was the perfect way to say goodbye.ok...so i had a dream affair and i actually feel guilty about it...well, i smile a lot but i do feel guilty.
God it was good...oh, so good....sorry.
man...
(i almost wish he could read this)so is it expressing how deeply he's touched me? mixed with a little pre-pregnancy anxiety? or did i just need that kind of pleasure brought to me. The shame of it is...NOTHING in real life could ever be THAT good!
thank GOD for dreams.
b2c.
poster:B2chica
thread:634154
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060406/msgs/634154.html