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hugs, termination, and how to deal

Posted by dia on March 25, 2006, at 19:54:01

Last summer I went to study abroad and then in the fall returned to my regular college. Before I left for the summer I met with my T and it was a very emotional session because I wouldn't be seeing him for a very long time, and we had been on a schedule of weekly and/or every other week appointments.

I was upset at that last appointment and he could tell. He offered me a hug and we hugged for a really long time and then I felt so much better. Because my college is sort of far away I don't see him hardly at all now. The problem is that he deals with kids and adolescents and I'm getting too old now to see him.

He's been in the middle of a messy divorce and when I have checked in with him by phone or have had the chance to schedule an appointment with him, I can tell he is stressed and he is not acting like himself. He had told me we could still see each other some during the summer but now is going back on his word and wants me to find a new T right away because I'm too old to be seen by him anymore.

Finally it was agreed that we would meet at least once during the summer to discuss the situation. I am so scared we will end things on a bad note. I have a serious boyfriend but have always kind of had a crush on this T. So I keep wishing that when I do see him for the last time he will give me another hug. But with his changed attitude I know I'm probably setting myself up for a huge disappointment.

If he acts nicer and knows I'm upset about ending everything would it be stupid to ask for a hug or should I wait and see if he offers one? I just crave some sort of physical comfort from him. I also don't know how to move on from him and it's so painful to even think about.

Has anyone ever had to face a termination after several years of a close relationship with a T? How did you deal with it?

*Dia*


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poster:dia thread:624617
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060325/msgs/624617.html