Posted by madeline on February 12, 2006, at 19:37:48
Okay, I hate sex. I mean I really really hate it. I think it is invasive, degrading and just too big of a violation of my own personal self. In fact, if I never had to be sexual or have sex again for the rest of my life, that would be just fine with me.
It makes me very nervous.
It comes up every now and again in therapy and my T very gently reminds me that it is not that way at all, that making love can be a wonderful thing. I just had all the wrong stuff written on me when I was a kid.
I've decided that (shock!) he might be right and that I want to talk about this tomorrow in therapy. I will probably chicken out. It's freaking me out already. But I want to get all of this out of me.
Right now, however, it feels like the top of my head just might blow off from all of the conflict in my head.
The way I feel about sex right now is very safe and I simply cannot IMAGINE allowing another man to have sex with me ever again, but that isn't normal.
Help! What should I do? Just call and cancel the appointment right?
poster:madeline
thread:609044
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060211/msgs/609044.html