Posted by Susan47 on December 19, 2005, at 22:42:27
In reply to Re: help/in love with my Therapist, posted by bird in the sky on December 17, 2005, at 0:45:46
> I don't know if anyone is continuing this thread. I am curious to know how Jadah is.
Hi, I think Jadah's either posting under another name, or has gone off the boards. I've asked once or twice with no success, no answers. Perhaps someone will let you know here. I'm sorry about your love for your therapist. I hope he handles it with sensitivity and success; you said you maybe want to see your T less but you don't know if he'll go for that; does it matter? These sessions are about Your health, not his. He has to have learned how to take care of himself. And I'll bet you he can. Worry less about him if you can. It sounds like he might be showing himself to be a bit more vulnerable to you than you're ready to handle.. actually. Hm. What's your feeling?
> I am another one in love with my Therapist. I thought it would gradually diminish but it has not. I guess I don't seem so needy and always thinking of him like i used to, but it seems more real and healthy now, not like obsession but like real love. It's just so depressing to (almost) accept the fact that i won't have an intimate or physical in any way relationship with him. I get so excited just with the thought that we could hug and what it would feel like to be mutual. I am so close to him and i believe i know him pretty well too. I've never had this before and i just can't hardly stand the idea that it's just an hour that i pay for. It's not a real relationship, though nothing has ever felt this real. Last time he said he had been thnking of me a lot and my feelings for him and his for me ("after all, i am human") and how he's glad i'm getting better. I am taking this out of context a little, but just to think he has feelings for me too, yet will not allow us to express them at all is pretty torturous. It has been a little over a year and a half i have been having these strong feelings for him and it doesn't seem to have a purpose for me. I have mixed feelings and want to see him less maybe, but i don't know if he'll go for that. Of course i would want to see him more, but all i do (just about) is talk about my love and desire for him. I know he would miss me too if i stopped seeing him. Is this supposed to be healing me? The original problem i went for has gotten a lot better and now problems with my husband i feel funny talking about because i have the feeling like my therapist is my boyfriend and wouldn't want to talk about my husband. Oh, i am sorry to have wasted your time... it really is a big thing to me even tho it may not sound like it. bird