Posted by crushedout on September 21, 2005, at 18:02:12
why do so many of us decide to join in and conspire against ourselves?
I'm just wondering. I have a moron/*sshole for a boss these days and today he decided to abuse me because he was feeling inadequate or something. And my instinct is to run out and harm myself: smoke, drink, whatever. Doesn't that seem silly?
Maybe it's not a self-destructive instinct, it's just that I want to calm myself down and medicate myself because of the anxiety and stress associated with feeling angry and helpless.
But it seems to be a common theme around here with folks. And it seems so frustrating to watch people have sh*t happen in their lives when they TOTALLY don't deserve it, and then watching them want to hurt *themselves* for it. With others (e.g., Dinah), I want to hug them and pet them and tell them to be nice to themselves or to let us do it if we can. (So many loving people here.) But with myself I just want to obliterate, burn bridges, self-destruct, give up on life.
Seems rather unadaptive as far as instincts go. Anyone want to pet me? I love petting.
P.S. (((((Dinah)))))
and ((((anyone else who needs it)))))
poster:crushedout
thread:557767
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050920/msgs/557767.html