Posted by Daisym on June 8, 2005, at 21:20:49
In reply to ''Courage to Heal'' » B2chica, posted by badhaircut on June 8, 2005, at 13:32:36
I find myself wanting to defend the book and agree with you at the same time. My therapist uses parts of the work book and only to help someone like me, who prefers to write, to begin to talk about the memories. He was very careful to work with me, not let me go off on my own with it.
I think the idea of recovered memories is really a confusing one. I think most of us have memories we've supressed, but speaking for myself, I always *knew* parts of it. Sort of like when you are talking with a friend about an event and the more you talk about it the more you recall into consciousness. I guess I would say that I read the book in pieces and parts, holding it ten feet from me (so it wouldn't hurt so much). I never even saw the part about "if you think you have, etc." Absolutes are *always* a bad idea. (sorry, had to).
The part I HATED about this book is that part about forgiving, and the way they advocate for a "survivor" (hate that term) to confront their family or abuser. And it felt to me, like if you weren't out there carrying a sign, vocalizing your past in a proud loud voice, then you were still "under" it all. Ick. I can't see myself as one of those militant kind of people who wear their abuse as sort of an "I dare you to flinch" kind of calling card.
But, like I said above, it was validating for me to see that other people fell apart when they first started to talk about this stuff. If nothing else, the chapter that says, "don't kill yourself when you feel like this" was worth the price of the book. I truly thought I was having a psychotic break the first few months of talking about it.
And I also wanted to thank you for your last paragraph. It was so eloquent and so true I printed it out. :)
poster:Daisym
thread:508459
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050606/msgs/509840.html