Posted by pinkeye on May 9, 2005, at 14:26:13
In reply to Tommorrow is the day, and more babbling, posted by happyflower on May 9, 2005, at 14:13:38
:-)
I guess I could console you and say "no you are not a sick transference puppy looking for the mom".
But guess what, I jsut realized I have felt the same about my ex T.. I was way too afraid of getting too close to my ex T, and even though I allowed myself to write to him a lot, I think I was always very very scared of him coming back and telling me the same thing. I even had nightmares several times about him coming back and telling me to stop contacting him.
It definitely feels that way.. Maybe if you are used to taking care of yourself all along, then it is hard to really let yourself depend on someone.. And I am don't know if therapists like it or not. Maybe GardenerGirl could ansewr that.And maybe it is really not possible for a human to support another human fully. To allow a person to depend on him/her fully. After all, Ts are also human right? So I think a better thing would be for you to rely more on God and lean on God, rather than on your T. You can discuss everything with him and trust him fully to be able to understand you, but I think it might be not a right expectation to think that he would take care of you. Does that make sense? Nobody can really take care of us, other than perhaps our moms/dads, ( and now I am realizing, taht they don't do it fully as well). That is why it is important to develop trust in God - atleast that worked for me. And really it is the same thing that Ts say you should be able to do - kind of fulfill yourselves. I think of it as not fulfilling myself by myself, but fulfilling myself with God. And that is easier to achieve for me.
poster:pinkeye
thread:495607
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050504/msgs/495608.html