Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 18, 2005, at 16:34:35
In reply to Re: What about PB pushes your buttons?, posted by Joslynn on January 18, 2005, at 9:36:09
Thank you for the apology yes I do feel put down and hurt when I post and have anyone not just you per se post as well as post around and hint on me and my life. I do not see the same being done to others who have chosen to do things that others find unethical or immoral. So to me, we have had this converstaion in the past and it is done.I heard your view and that of others. I can only speak for me and not the other poster I do not know if she is happy or not. Myself I am NOT being taken advantage of in the least ...I am very strong and my T and I have as I told a poster in chat picked out a ring. He has filed for a divorce and I will be soon. Our plan is to marry in 2 years...BUT being a realist I know that could go either way....I could fall flat on my face. Please don't worry on me if I fall I will get back up... I am not that fragile...That is my call and the pain will be mine and his if there IS any...When someone slashes their arms up I do not nag lecture them or bring up old posts of theirs. I just want to be free to speak too and without being what I feel is smacked on the head for my issues NOT that YOU have smacked me on the head but sometimes things do go well with these relationships..NOT OFTEN...It IS rare VERY rare...I hope you stay but allow me my voice too...I do see posts from people who cut themselves and some who are cheating on a spouse, having pre marital sex, are suicidal..I do not feel the need to tell everyone to not do that it is bad and immoral and will hurt them..
Maybe Dr Bob could have a disclaimer on the top of this site stating the Moral and Ethical issues on this as it pertains to the APA so nobody....and I do not mean you ..but nobody has to feel the need to basically ask me not to be me and talk on me :( I let otheres be themeselves and I try to help then I work on me.
I really like you we have had nice talks in the past . I do not think MOST people should go with these crossings also but in some cases...it works and its not a victim situation.
In most cases it is.
Thank you
> Fallen, I am not sure if you mean that you thought my posts made your felt put down or something else? I miss a lot of posts because I pop in and out during work. To clarify, when I was thinking of the boundary violations by Ts, it wasn't just one poster I recalled. It was you, plus TMP, who seems like such a sweet but vulnerable person whose T really took advantage of her, now her future has been permanently changed. And there was someone else, but now I don't remember. I thought there was a third person and I apologize if I don't remember this correctly.
>
> Please understand, I don't think you or other victims of therapist abuse did anything wrong. It is the Ts who are in the wrong. And I think that other posters should not be afraid to say that, because there are lots of other people reading and lurking who may really be unsure about this subject. And when other posters say things that sound congratulatory, that could be really confusing for someone.
>
> It's one of those gray areas. We all know driving recklessly, SI, etc is harmful to us, but to accept the romantic attention of a professional who knows your heart and mind....I can see how that could feel so good even if it ended up hurting someone in the long run.
>
> This is going to be my last post on this board, because for one thing, I am obviously just making posters feel criticized and not Ts, and two, I really do need to stay off the internet at work because we are entering the busy period. So this seems like a good reason to stay off here. The last thing I meant was for the victims to feel blamed.
>
> I do wish you luck. You have posted some nice things to me in the past and I never meant to make you feel hurt or criticized. I am sure I will not be able to resist lurking from time to time, but I will refrain from posting, so as not to hurt more feelings.
poster:Fallen4MyT
thread:439682
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050117/msgs/443805.html