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Re: clean house, clean mind? » Shortelise

Posted by littleone on January 18, 2005, at 15:16:40

In reply to clean house, clean mind?, posted by Shortelise on January 18, 2005, at 1:43:42

I understand you completely. For me at least, the two are very intertwined.

I am a terrible horder and about a year ago, I had a very bad period of feeling complete nothingness. However, because I felt nothingness, I was able to go through my entire house and pile up everything that I did not need. This pile has literally filled a room.

I was going to take it in loads down to the markets, sell it off and buy something nice for myself with the money.

But my nothingness abated, my feelings returned kind of, and I was unable to get rid of it all. So for the past year, I've had this room full of junk. And for the past year, it feels like it's been cluttering up my head as well.

Now I don't even care about the money, I just want to get rid of it all. I'd be happy just taking it all to the dump, but I just can't seem to do it.

I know that I could just rope someone in to help me, but I can't even bare to do that knowing that it would be the first step in ditching it all.

Sorry, I've gotten way off track here.

I also meant to share that when I'm depressed I can't lift a finger in the house. I really do find that the state of my house affects the state of my mind. But it's all a viscious circle. I can't clean 'cause I'm depressed, I get more depressed over my dirty house, then I'm even more unable to clean.

I think my depression has started to lift since we've been playing cards and I can start to feel stirrings to clean a certain shelf or whatever. I would love to spiral upwards for a change.

 

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