Posted by fallsfall on November 18, 2004, at 7:38:13
In reply to Re: what she wrote » fallsfall, posted by crushedout on November 17, 2004, at 23:22:04
I'm sorry it hurts. Hopefully this will be a "therapeutic opportunity" (Don't you just love those...?) so that at least some good can come out of the pain. You are doing great. Yes, making the appointment with your new therapist was an excellent idea.
I don't know if you are like me in this other respect: I have always been really bad at knowing when to quit, when to give up and move on. I have repeatedly kept working on something long past the time when it was helpful simply because I didn't know how to determine that I was wasting my time. In your circumstance this would translate into keeping trying to make the therapy work - because if it wasn't working then I must be doing something wrong. I wouldn't want to fail, so I would keep trying... and keep trying... and keep trying... So when my therapist didn't call me back I think that in one sense I was really confused - why was she giving up (particularly without a fight)? Giving up was so foreign to me. In retrospect, I think that she was simply using reasonable judgement in knowing when it wasn't time to fight anymore. It is all getting a little less foreign to me now, but this issue has taken me a long time to work on.
I know that it feels bad. Just try to remember that just because it feels bad, that it doesn't necessarily mean that it is the wrong thing to be doing. Sometimes the right thing feels bad, too. Like getting a shot - it hurts for the moment, but is helpful in the long run.
Good luck with your session this morning.
poster:fallsfall
thread:416384
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041113/msgs/417347.html