Posted by gardenergirl on September 30, 2004, at 19:36:20
In reply to GG - I have a question back!, posted by Speaker on September 30, 2004, at 11:19:03
Hi Speaker,
I'm sorry about the way things ended with your former T. I would imagine that was very hard. Especially knowing he knew all that time. Yikes! I'm glad you are able to work with a new T and to talk about it in that setting.As far as contact...it is hard and awkward at times. And just like the therapy relationship is unique, I think email contact after is unique. Like you said, it would be odd to send along jokes, write small talk or etc. when you've had an intimate (not sexual, but emotionally) and yet one-sided relationship. What I tell clients is that I do care about them, and I would love to hear from them to know how they are doing. I add the caveat that I may not be able to respond for any number of reasons so that they are not blindsided if I do not. That also keeps it more one direction of info, kind of like the therapy relationship is. That being said, I agree that no response at all would be awful...just like if you were in a session and the T never said a word or indicated they even heard you. So I do like to acknowledge that I got message and was glad to hear it.
As far as what to write yourself? I suppose it depends on what you want him to know, and why you want him to know it. How's that for a T-like answer? I think update type communications make a lot of sense from a human being perspective. But I suppose if you were to want to continue to tell your former T the same types of things you are working on now with your current, that might be more tricky, and perhaps not good for you in the long run.
Hope this helps....
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:368821
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040925/msgs/397465.html