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Re: Matt DDS? Other CBT'ers? » fires

Posted by Dinah on July 23, 2004, at 6:44:02

In reply to Re: Doctors moods, posted by fires on July 23, 2004, at 0:17:36

Ahhh, you are a CBT fan. There are some other CBT fans around too, that often feel that they don't have enough people who feel totally positively about CBT to have a decent conversation. :)

How did CBT help your life? I'm always interested in how different schools of therapy help different people.

Much of my therapist's practice is CBT work. I find some of it very helpful. I think it teaches many valuable coping techniques, and maybe should be part of school curriculum.

But I'll admit to being bewildered by some of it. My therapist also says what you just said. That no one else can be responsible for a person's moods. But that just doesn't seem right. It sounds like one of those things that *sounds* good, but is missing a key logical component.

For example. If someone I knew and trusted walked up to me and without a word shot me in the leg, I might feel hurt and surprised, and very very angry. I understand that the CBT take on it is that I could *choose* to feel another way entirely. But the facts are that I was happily wandering around, feeling safe and cheerful. Then someone I trusted deliberately shot me in the leg! If someone hadn't shot me in the leg, I'd still feel happy and cheerful. But now I don't. How can the person who shot me in the leg deny all responsibility for my mood by saying my mood is my own responsibility and no one else can *cause* my mood? It seems to me to be a very non-communal attitude to take, and not at all in keeping with the nature of mankind, which is very interpersonal in its orientation.

And *naturally* I'm not comparing Susan's actions to shooting her doctor in the leg, or to doing anything wrong. Often those of us who pick up easily on the moods of others assume that *we* are the cause of the other people's moods, when really they've just had a car accident or their wife left them or they've got a bad case of gas.

I'm just wondering about a CBT point that I've always found a bit confusing.

 

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