Posted by ghost on May 4, 2004, at 21:52:10
In reply to Should I send this email to my T?, posted by crushedout on May 4, 2004, at 21:29:57
Crushed,
I think it's really positive that you're thinking of just taking a day off from your T rather than firing her completely. I think you're being really open about the situation by not severing ties with her altogether.
If i were in your situation i would also ponder whether or not i was being manipulative. but knowing what little i know, i think you are very justified in your feelings at this point. i think that taking a day off might be good if you think you need some cool-down time and definitely want to approach the issues at hand later. but if you can't see yourself feeling comfortable with her ever again, then perhaps you need more than a week off. incidentally, i don't think that a t. with whom you cannot be completely honest and open is a well-matched combination. you shouldn't have to censor what you say, particularly when what you say is so valid and pertinent to your situation. it is imperative that you get help for your problems, and feeling badly about bringing them up (or not bringing them up at all) is a totally non-productive situation, in my opinion.
as far as the letter itself goes, kudos to you for telling her that you feel unsafe. a t. should be creating the ultimate safe-space for a person, and your t.'s failure to do so (or inability, perhaps-- it might not be her fault) is an important factor in this equation. good for you for coming out and saying it. i'm sorry that you regret bringing *anything* up to your t., and i would think she should know this, as well. when a client constantly has to think about what is and isn't acceptable to discuss in an environment that should be the epitome of open and honest, the whole relationship should be reevaluated... in my opinion.
that was really long-winded. i hope you don't mind. :/ i don't even know if i answered your questions. good luck. keep us posted...
poster:ghost
thread:343415
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040503/msgs/343422.html