Posted by starlight on April 7, 2004, at 16:25:21
I'm devastated. I read through my medical records to find out about a recent surgical procedure that I had, and came across my mental health file.
When I first started with my Pdoc, I wanted to be totally honest with him about my habits. I asked him to keep my herbal smoking habit completely out of my file. I told him that if he wanted to keep it in a shadow file, that was fine, but that I wanted to keep it out of my main medical records. So imagine my surprise when I read through and found his comments on it from every visit. Right down to his comments about how he thought there was no hope of me ever quitting.
He described me as being garish, sexually flirtatious and even mentioned that at one visit I had dyed my hair darker and commented on my makeup. First, I hardly wear much makeup at all - a touch of eyeshadow - sometimes, eyebrow pencil, mascara and lipstick. I'm young - 35, tall and thin and in the summer, it's hot, so I've worn some cute sundress type of dresses, but never without a lightweight cotton sweater, and never above the knee.
The way I dress is actually very conservative and I'm blown away by his comments. I work in a professional office with a male boss and am cautious to not come across in a sexual manner. I am totally devastated by the fact that his comments and session records are included in my main record - and he speaks of things that he has assured me that he wouldn't. He assured me time and time again, that I could trust him. And I see that I can't and am totally hurt.
Then he went on to say, in one of the records that I was also narcissistic and histrionic - I believe as co-morbid features.
I'm a talented and hardworking musician, yoga enthusiast and I have a vibrant personality, but I'm well aware of boundaries and care about and respect others completely. I sure as heck don't see myself as any more important than anyone else on this earth. I told my friend that I work with about this and she too was shocked. She couldn't believe his descriptions of me. Garish.... How is that possible? I can't either. I'm so disappointed, but it's out there now - in the main file and what can I do about it? Nothing right? I wanted to rip those pages right out of my record. What about insurance companies, do they have a right to see his notes if they're a part of my record?
I'd love to tell him that I read my record, but also feel the need to cover my butt about my smoking habit so he'll write a note in there saying I quit. I can get my primary care physician to manage my medications, I think. I'd like go back one very last time and tell him that I'm aware of the records and feel as if he's completely betrayed me and lied to me by saying I could trust him - and that he's fired.
starlight
poster:starlight
thread:333780
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040402/msgs/333780.html