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Re: Frustrated! » Joslynn

Posted by emmaley on March 28, 2004, at 21:10:59

In reply to Re: Frustrated! » emmaley, posted by Joslynn on March 28, 2004, at 10:35:58

No! It's helpful! :) :) :)

What you said triggered a thought: maybe that was indeed what he wanted: for me to emote and show the feelings underneath the words.

Problem is, I don't want to do what he wants. I want to do what I want. Hmm, interesting. I wanted reflection and feedback at that moment, and I didn't want to be probed for my thoughts. I had just done that--pouring myself onto three pages of a letter. If he was confused, I wanted him to ask me questions in reference to the letter rather than asking an broad question because we were talking about something very, very, very difficult for me and my mind tends go blank when we go near that issue. I wanted to know what he felt like he had witnessed through reading the letter and we go from there. It's like, I show a bit of myself, and you mirror back to me what you see. If I feel like we are on the same page, then I feel like I have the security I need to show another part of myself. If we are not on the same page, then we can start to get on the same page. How else am I going to know that you are capable of seeing me or if you are seeing me right? Better yet, you can tell me what you are seeing that I am not but once you say it I feel like I can finally connect the dots!

True, I could reveal myself regardless of what the therapist reflects, but I don't particularly want to do that. To me, I don't know what I am paying for then.

WOW! I didn't realize I felt this way! Thanks for your feedback!


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poster:emmaley thread:328852
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040327/msgs/329618.html