Posted by Medusa on December 29, 2003, at 7:25:04
So I'm in this short-term therapy:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030925/msgs/265933.html
So far, it's working really, really well.
But last time, I asked exactly which systemic therapy approach they align themselves with, and they gave me the name of an institute where I had a pretty bad experience. Not even my therapy - I just went with my then-SO. I think I need to tell my therapy team about this, but I don't know how to go about it, and I'm really, really afraid that they'll just defend the offender.
Here's what happened in the other institute:
My then-SO had left his family's business, and wanted help finding a new "place" in his family. Well, the therapist -who turned out to be the director of the institute- had dollar signs flashing in his eyes, and wouldn't let go of the idea of the family business as a client. Every other sentence that came out of his mouth was about what great businesses he'd helped, the piles of money they were fighting over that he had to sort out, and how fabulous he was. He was helpful in some ways, but he was clearly more interested in gaining a corporate client than he was in the people sitting right in front of him. Once he figured out that 1) then-SO wasn't going to refer the business to him, and 2) even if he had, the business wasn't flashy, he blatantly neglected the client's interests.Well, a donkey's a donkey, and I hadn't let it bother me too much.
Until this past session in my own therapy.
Of course, the bad treatment by the other therapist brings up a lot of crap. The end of a marriage, in which I'd made a LOT of compromises "for the business", and the man didn't have the cajones to stand up to his own family, so any time they said boo to me, I was supposed to kneel. The fact that this so-called family was so enthralled with themselves, thought they were big-biz, but their competitors and "friends" didn't treat them well at all, and I was +married+ to that. Very, very bad judgement on my part. Ick. (Given, it's a foreign country, but married partners deserve each other, no handicaps granted.)
Anyway, I don't want to lose an extremely productive therapy over this. But it's standing in the way of my progress. I guess I have to go back to the why-do-therapists-try-to-get-away-with-murder-with-me question.
poster:Medusa
thread:294255
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031221/msgs/294255.html