Psycho-Babble Grief | about grief, mourning, loss | Framed
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Cancer's a tough ride

Posted by prin3546 on July 24, 2008, at 13:03:28

I wanted to tell everyone my story to give people hope. At age 19, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I got surgery, then chemo. When all the tests showed the chemo had worked, I was so happy. My boyfriend(of 8 months) and i were so happy to have made it past this tough ordeal. 8 months later, the Cancer had come back. I was going to lose my hair all over again and this time they wanted to do a stem cell transplant. I was so scared but with the support of my family and boyfriend I made it through. After 6 months of having a good bill of health, the cancer returned. This time, they were going to do a double (back to back) stem cell transplant and I was scared to death! Then, before the 2 transplants, I found out I was pregnant. My doctor told me I had to get an abortion because of my cancer. I have never believed in abortion for myself, but I was left with no choice. On the way to the clinic, I begged my fiance(we got engaged!) to take me somewhere far away. I didn't want to walk in there and do it. We finally went in and I had the abortion. It was one of the worst feelings in my life, even after all the treatments I had already received. I got the 2 transplants, and then my doctor explained to me that I had to get a full hysterectomy to ensure that the cancer didn't return. I was devastated all over again. Not only did I have to give up my first child, but now I would never be able to have my own children. That had been my dream for as long as I could remember, to get older, get married and start a family. I felt like there was no God, because if there was, why would he do this to me? How could he take away the one thing I had left? Then, I discovered HOPE. Things always look better in the morning, and God always has a purpose. There is HOPE, and no matter how alone you feel, you're never really alone. God could be watching over you, your grandparents, your parents, even your unborn child. Just have faith in that and you'll always survive. Now, it's 6 years later, I'm married, healthy, and hoping to adopt soon. Keep your head held up high and everything will work out in the end-even if you have the bumpiest ride around!!!




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