Posted by Estella on August 8, 2006, at 20:55:44
In reply to Re: please be civil » Dr. Bob, posted by Tomatheus on August 8, 2006, at 17:05:39
> I fail to see how anything I wrote was uncivil/incivil, but maybe I'm missing something.> in all likelihood, you'll never see any of the harm that will probably result from your "lecture," much less do anything to help those who might be harmed.
entails 'your lecture probably results in harm'
ouch.
entils 'you probably won't do anything to help those who might be harmed'
ouch.it can be hard to not respond to incivilities in kind. that is why... they tend to be considered 'incivil'. because they tend to result in defensiveness, lashing out, further incivility.
it is considered incivil to respond to incivilities in kind, however. why? because they tend to result in further defensiveness, lashing out, and further incivility.
so there can be an escalating cycle...
pbc's are supposed to be warnings so that everyone involved in the thread takes a deep breath and kind of regroups. if people continue in the same vein then blockings are imminent.
> I also find it absurd that you only quoted *one* line from Kylenn's posts that appeared to put others down and then lumped it together with my so-called uncivil/incivil statement into a single PBC.
economy of time. he quoted hers first and yours second. he saw that she posted hers first and yours was the response. the situation was starting to escalate and thus the both of you were warned.
> Doesn't the *number* of statements in a post that could lead others to feel put down or accused mean anything to you?if there is something particularly attacking then sometimes he will go straight in with a block (so long as the poster has a pbc somewhere in their history so their attention has been drawn to the faq). other than that... i think it is done on a post by post basis, though could be wrong.
is it that you think she deserves more punishment than you do?
i think bob might be more interested in preventing the process of escalation rather than assigning blame. people choose to post and some people choose to post incivilities. we are responsible for what we post *regardless* of what another poster has posted before.
i'm just glad nobody got blocked :-)
> I won't be writing any more responses here, though.
:-(
i'll be sorry to see you go :-(i remember... i felt really very bad and upset when i got my first pbc. really very bad. it was something of a shock. it is just a warning to be careful on that thread. and an encouragement to read the faq and try and understand *why* you got the warning.
an upside is... if someone posted what you posted and they directed it to you... they would probably be warned as well.
it is about trying to keep a supportive atmosphere.
poster:Estella
thread:674974
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20060802/msgs/675033.html