Posted by johnLA on October 17, 2013, at 14:53:10
In reply to Were you a ECT horror story?, posted by SLS on October 15, 2013, at 20:17:26
hi scott-
not sure your motivation for this thread? curious about that...
i had 12 unilateral ect's 3+ years ago. i don't consider myself a ect 'horror story.'
believe it, or not, i was only a few months in to my 1st ever serious depression. looking back i am still surprised that it was offered so very early. though, in defense of the doctors, i was claiming i was suicidal and looking-up plans.
if you want more info about me 'getting talked into' ect just let me know. looking back i can say i was having severe reactions to psych meds. never took them before in my life. the akathisia i realize now was literally making me lose my mind. nobody seemed to offer any info about that at the time.
i was at ucla. one of the top psychiatric hospitals in the world. i would have done anything for the 'pain' to stop. a doctor came to me and suggested ect. my new pdoc also suggested it. i was in very very bad shape.
i knew nothing of psychiatry at this point.
i said yes.
a miracle happened on the first treatment; no depression. the ruminations were still there, but i realized wtf i am thinking about killing myself? this lasted about a day. with each treatment i would get about 1 or 2 days of depression relief.
i was scheduled for an 'index' of 12 and then to go on to maintenance treatments. i decided to stop at 12. i had had enough.
do i have lingering memory problems? no. did it work on my depression? yes and no. am i sorry i tried it? hmmmm...still trying to digest that one. this whole depression deal has been a nightmare. i was very high functioning for 47 years until i crashed.
i have mentioned this before in other threads; when i was getting my ect i was very well taken care off. the staff and doctors at ucla are top-notch. many 'vips' like kitty dukakis (when her husband is teaching during the winter quarter at ucla) and carrie fisher do their maintenance treatments with the same doc/staff. there are more well-known people as well.
in the end i need to realize it was just another failed attempt to beat my depression. i am working on that. it is difficult to accept at times that i had ect due to the stigma. at the same time it takes a pretty courageous person to 'go for it.' i'm hoping as i get better that i will think less of it. and, if i do, i will realize that i was very unwell and was willing to try a very scary thing to get better. i love life. that's why i did it.
so, again, i consider myself not to be a ect horror story.
i am still curious why you started this thread scott. ;)
john
poster:johnLA
thread:1052353
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20130930/msgs/1052436.html