Posted by B2chica on March 26, 2012, at 8:16:43
i need some assistance.
i'm not sure what to do.
i'm not sure if its all in my mind. if there really is this connection or not.
can anyone help me sort it out.it seems as though since i started buspar that i became very tired and lethargic. this turned into a lingering depression. mild but present.
last monday i wrote a note and left it for my pdoc at his office telling him this asking what i should do. i didnt hear from him.
this last week i noticed i started thinking more negative thoughts. like plans for suicide.
i will then sort of obsess on them, thinking out the benefits and the bad. the torrid disaster i would leave behind. i also think of a clean completion. then countering with incompletion and life altering effects.
each of these stir such strong emotions and increase my anxiety.
i am not sad all the time. i am obsession about my plan figuring out if its the right thing to do or not.
even though my logical mind KNOWS its not. i cant. my childrens lives would be ruined by me if i did this.but i dont know what to do.
could it be the buspar? is it something else? is it all psychological and not chemical? my pdoc is out of town all this week.
i wrote him another note on sat when i knew he would be in. i asked the secretary to Please give it to him.
i also made an appt but not till April 2.i slept most of yesterday. i was so aggitated with everyone. i cant seem to do anything right.
i am taking it day by day and sometimes hour by hour.**************************
i dont even know how to phrase my question.
so do i stop buspar? is that the culprit.
if so how do i stop it.
what do i do to get through the week...b2
"What is madness, but nobility of soul at odds with circumstance.
The day is on Fire, and i know the purity of pure despair."
Theodore Roethke
poster:B2chica
thread:1014015
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20120316/msgs/1014015.html