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Re: Advice, support, LONG RANT WARNING » uncouth

Posted by g_g_g_unit on October 4, 2011, at 8:07:52

In reply to Re: Advice, support, LONG RANT WARNING, posted by uncouth on October 3, 2011, at 23:06:41

i just want to say that your rant hit uncomfortably close to home. i've been suffering from the exact same 'dialectical challenge' (as you put it) and it's become an insurmountable roadblock to getting better, because the desire to self-medicate is so overwhelming. in my case (i can't speak for you, obviously) i just don't trust that practitioners necessarily have my best interests at hand and so will constantly doctor shop, try to manipulate them, fetishize exotic drugs/combinations, etc. in addition to trying to contend with severe OCD, i feel like everyday is this self-enclosed thing where i never really make any plans or progress or instate long-term changes.

i've never come clean about it with a psychiatrist, but am trying to deal with the problem through CBT.

i think your solution - to withdraw from everything and escape - has obvious echoes of the all-or-nothing addict's mindset. maybe (this is something i've thought about) it would be better to establish some kind of treatment endpoint you want to arrive at? does your psych know about your problem? again, like you say, it's so much easier advising others, because i know that as soon as i sense my psych might potentially wanna cut me off from meds, i grow incredibly threatened and distraught.

do you feel like you're using meds/supplements to try and reach a pre-illness state?

 

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