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Re: med help/suggestions/advice/does it get better? » creepy

Posted by Solstice on September 3, 2011, at 10:25:04

In reply to Re: med help/suggestions/advice/does it get better?, posted by creepy on September 2, 2011, at 18:26:16

> This was an awesome post, thank you. Your therapist sounds really good! Wish mine pushed me that hard sometimes.

I'm honored if something I said was helpful to you, Creepy :-)

It's interesting to me in retrospect, but my therapist and I had some struggles over the pushing issue. T pushed, and I resisted. Strongly. Early on, I felt pushed beyond what I was able to cooperate with. I would brood over it between sessions.

One of the most transforming (for me) things about therapy for me, is that from the beginning, T told me "if there is anything that goes on in here that becomes a problem for you, talk to me about it. We will work it out together." So after agonizing and brooding over feeling pushed beyond where I could 'go,' I would eventually object. T would listen reflectively.. and would step back from the pushing. Then, when I gained sturdiness, the pushing would start again. This cycle went on for a couple of years! But the gold in those experiences is that without fail, T listened to my objections. T repeatedly told me that my sense of myself and my needs would always supercede. The repeated experiences I had with being 'allowed' to object, being heard, T responding to my objections by stepping back.. all of that forged a deep attachment. I felt so safe. Whereas before therapy I was very reluctant to respect my own instincts, from these experiences I learned how to listen to and stand by my instincts. T and I have talked a lot during the last year about *who* is responsible for my progress. Both T and I agree that it's primarily been in my hands.. but I insist that T's responsiveness and therapeutic instincts have been the lubrication that kept the gears in operation :-) It truly is a joint effort. I hope that T takes joy in my healing, and that participating in my healing is at least as enriching as the financial compensation.

Sol


 

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poster:Solstice thread:995585
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110902/msgs/995718.html