Posted by uncouth on April 21, 2009, at 18:44:10
In reply to Re: After ECT #16, feel *qualitatively* different, posted by bleauberry on April 19, 2009, at 12:25:32
I'm just so tired. So so so very tired. Tired of the electricity, tired of the rTMS not working, tired of the spiral of depression, where depression makes you do things in life that then really give you something to be MORE depressed about. I'm tired of it all. I'm giving it another week of ECT, and then I'm going to kill myself.
How should I go about it? I have about 2 months supply of nortriptyline....is overdosing on a TCA relatively painless? I figure I could combine it with some chomped up seroquels and benzos.
Please don't try to talk me out of it, or find the authorities, I'm already "getting help". It's just I'm so tired, tired, tired of the pain pain and pain.
Why can't I be normal...why do I have to know more about psychotropic drugs than I do about college basketball or pop music or fun things in life. Why didn't God give me that ability to experience a normal, pleasurable hard-but-worth-it non-depressed life?
Instead, i've been given chronic, unrelenting, suicidal depression. And now I'm getting my brain shocked.
F*ck it all. One or two weeks, then uncouth is unliving.
poster:uncouth
thread:891481
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090416/msgs/891992.html