Posted by blueboy on July 9, 2008, at 8:26:37
In reply to Lamictal combinations, posted by bidatheraptor on July 6, 2008, at 22:42:35
> i have bipolar 2. i am taking lamictal and topamax and it's bad! i'm super anxious and suicidal all the time. I've been on Lamictal almost 5 years, so obviously it's Topamax which I've been on 2 weeks.
> Does anyone take Lamictal with another mood stabilizer?
> I need help, please please help me. I'm going down. I've wanted to kill myself every day for a month now. I looked through my medication cabinet today, and I looked through it yesterday too. I keep feeling more hopeless.
> Here is a description of me off of meds (which hasn't happened in over 5 years, I'm still way way better mentally than that):
> constantly suicidal, crying every night, anxious, depressed mixed states-racing suicidal thoughts, major cutting and burning of myself. as far as mania, hypomanic, never full-blown mania but spending out of control, eating out of control, getting into debt, being a sh*tty person, saying things i don't mean or want to say, binge eating, throwing up, just being CRAZY.
> I did really well for three years. I would say I literally had NO symptoms of mental illness. In the past 2 years, the Lamictal has slowly stopped being as effective. Now I would say that I have the symptoms of a person with clinical depression--which is, obviously, still better than before. But I am crying all the time, suicidal, isolating, not leaving my house except to work, sleeping for 14 hours, etc. It doesn't matter if it's better than before. It's too painful. My Dr. is nice but asks what I want because I've been taking RX since high school. So does anyone here have suggestions? or does anyone here have words of comfort?
> because seriously, at some point, with mental illness, you don't have anyone to talk to anymore. i'm married, and my husband is great, but you know what? he can only hear me say i want to kill myself so many times. you know?
> it. gets. boring.My first instinct would be to get off the Topomax ASAP. BPP suggested the use of low-dosage lithium, which might be worth a try.
If you haven't tried it, get some cognitive-behavioral therapy. It will help. If nothing else, it reminds you that the terrible feelings and disturbing behavior will get better in the future. One of the worst things about depression is that it clouds your mind. Like, if your mind is clear and you are in pain, knowing that it is going to get better in the future can really help you get through it.
It does sound like a bit of a poop out, if you are feeling depressed, since preventing bipolar depression is supposedly Lamictal's strong suit.
How much Lamictal are you taking? And how big are you? Maybe you want to consider increasing the dosage, if the side effects are not bad.
I have found that a temporary large dose of Klonopin before bedtime helps me out a LOT. I realize there's a big question about whether this would help you, because in my case, some of my pain comes from insomnia and the resulting lack of sleep. Still, Klonopin makes me feel a lot better the next day than Ambien, so it's more than just getting sleep.
And HANG IN THERE! I'm married also, and I know how distressing it can be to have a spouse and feel like you are a burden. But I realize, from looking at other couples where one of them is sick, how much your life can mean even when your symptoms are at their bottom.
Can you find some sort of support group and manage to get to it? I bet your husband would drive you. My last bad mixed episode, I was out of town on vacation with other people, and the various suicide hotlines I called were not helpful. I managed to get to an AA meeting, of all things, and the people there were a big help to me. (Of course, on the negative side, this isn't an option for a lot of people, but on the positive side, AA isn't a suicide or depression group either and they helped anyway.)
poster:blueboy
thread:838531
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20080706/msgs/838979.html