Posted by NewHampshireGuy on May 20, 2008, at 16:23:04
Ok where to begin....
I have a very serious chemical sensitivity/horrible nearly fatal reactions to the meds I have tried in the past: Effexor, Elavil, Neurontin, and Dilantin.
My doctor recognizes and believes all of my very real and very serious side effects when I start taking these medications unfortunately.
Some of the side affects, and they are all the same on all of these meds are: VERY significantly increased depression and anxiety, suicidal thoughts where there were absolutely NONE before taking the meds, huge fog takes over brain, sensory/perception gets out of wack like blurred vision, extreme sensitivity to noise, popping in ears, sharp pains shooting in ears.
Also, muscle twitching, images flashing through my mind, songs getting stuck in my head like a radio (not hearing voices lol), racing thoughts increased by 100x, horrific nightmares that are extremely vivid and disturbing (off meds I don't even really remember my dreams let alone have bad or weird dreams). It's like the meds are almost CAUSING pyschosis when some of them should be helping!
When I stop the meds, these symptoms all slowly go away after a couple weeks and half lives wear off. But during that time I am basically immobilized and have lost jobs to having to take new meds and not reacting well to them. When I stop, I feel back to fine except not being able to sleep
My question is, in reality, am I most likely going to have the same reaction on Seroquel? I am praying to god tonight that this is my medication and praying it will work
But it sounds like anything that is touching on my serotonin receptors/transmitters is causing these meds to have the EXACT OPPOSITE affect as they should
My doc is starting me on 1/4 chunks of 25 mg of Seroquel to slowly build me up, but I am just worried that the same thing is going to happen.
This is not because I don't have faith in medicine. At one time, Effexor turned my life around and brought me out of a serious depression. At that point, I was a stupid kid in highschool and made some very poor decisions of taking exstacy, which I am very embarrassed by. I believe it damaged my serotonin receptors and my doc says that she has heard of cases of people not being able to take meds like these after exstacy, where they could take them before
I am scared to start taking this new med, but would do ANYTHING to shut off my brain and am open to a med that works.
It's like my brain is always on with no off switch at night and I always have high energy when trying to fall asleep and have very bad insomnia and self medicate with marijuana/indica varieties that help greatly with sleep and anxiety (marijuana is not the problem IMO and I have been open to thinking it is, but I have quit many times for long amounts of time and it actually makes everything much worse)
I am taking the marijuana route until I can find a medication that work and trying to get off of Klonopin, Ativan and Ambien, because I have found a good strong indica marijuana strain is like taking 5 Klonopins, minus the addiction. And you never build a tolerance to it, but of coarse the legal consequences so may move to California for medical permit.
Just seems like the logical choice to me since these meds have failed me/nearly killed me and as MJ is a faily benign substance when used with moderation (before bedtime)
Can someone please give me ANY insight on what might be going on with my brain and what I should do? Should I take the Seroquel?
I was first diagnosed with depression then bipolar Not Otherwise Specified because my doctor says my case is VERY atypical and not like any case she has seen before. she says I don't seem overly bipolar.
In all honestly, I don't feel depressed at all, have a very happy life with good friends and a girlfriend, I just have a mind that won't shut itself off at night/racing thoughts/songs stuck in head and can't sleep.
Is Seroquel going to help this and rebalance my brains chemicals? Please help, I am very scared
poster:NewHampshireGuy
thread:830164
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20080519/msgs/830164.html