Posted by Racer on May 31, 2007, at 12:27:27
In reply to Re: Helpless, posted by Squiggles on May 31, 2007, at 11:52:28
> all it takes is to examine the meds :-(
>Actually, that's probably not all it takes. Maybe that's all it takes for you -- but you're not talking about you here, you're talking about your friend. It may be that she has different needs.
I gotta agree with GreyWolf -- who's a mighty smart fellow -- that the best you can do is to take care of yourself. That may include distancing yourself somewhat from your friend. Painful as I know that has been for me in the past in similar situations, it was also the only way for me to take care of myself. And taking care of yourself is probably the most effective thing you can do, sad as that is to say.
As for your friend, I've found the semi-Socratic method to be the most effective. Ask her questions, and then really listen to her answers. Don't try to tell her what to do, that just doesn't work well for most people. Ask her what's behind this. Once you have heard her out, you can start asking other questions, like "When you've gone off your meds in the past, how has that worked out for you? Why do you think this might be different? Would you still want to stop your meds if they worked better? &c" The main thing, though, is that you let her talk, and you listen, and just ask for more clarity. It may be that, after thinking about it a little more, and thinking about details, she may modify her ideas.
Another thing that might help -- as long as you just ask gently -- is to remind her of events or details from her other forays into MedicationFreeVille. She probably doesn't remember those events all too clearly -- we don't remember pain accurately, which is what allows us to go on sometimes. I know that I was profoundly depressed earlier this year, worse than I've been in some time. And yet, for all that I remember that it happened, I cannot for the life of me remember anything much about what it was actually like. Your friend probably has a similar blind spot about her own depressive episodes.
Good luck to you, and good luck to your friend.
poster:Racer
thread:760534
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070524/msgs/760574.html