Posted by platinumbride on February 2, 2007, at 19:52:01
Hi ...
I had a distressing visit with my p-doc yesterday. The worst of it was that he wanted to stick me in the hospital immediately for ECT (I am not through thinking about wheter or not I want that, and if I DO, I am NOT going to live in a psych ward for 3 weeks to get it! I will wait till the weather gets better to make the hour long drive at 5:00 am and do it as an outpatient).
After I refused, he started picking things out of a hat. Geodon was what he decided, until I reminded him that I was worried about akathesia. (I experienced this badly on 5 mgs abilify). I just needed a little hand - holding on this one!
Then he seemed annoyed. He mentioned parnate, since I DID get releif from nardil, but with a lot of side-effects, that, as I got ready to start grad school, I was afraid of - like the need for the 4 hour nap. I needed a little reassurance that the crippling anxiety that I have would not be exacerbated by parnate, and he went blank. This guy who has such a great reputation in an area where there are a lot of depressed and suicidal people (I live in an Ivy League College town in NY state) gets stumped at parnate! And I ask him, point blank, how many people he has prescribed it to. One, he says. I was kind of scared when he admitted that. It reminded me that he was totally against using provigil with nardil and made me see more ignorance in his arrogance.
So I mentioned (after doing so before) that maybe I should try abilify again, but at a 2.5 mg dose. He says you could do that, and then seems really annoyed and starts telling me that he is just frustrated because he cannot seem to help me. I let him know that I am angry at him for this.
He then proposes vicodin. I see this as only a temporary solution, but since I KNOW how it feels (great) I think about it (plus, he is starting to run over and has about had it with me).
I quickly mention tricyclics and he acts as if a light bulb has been turned on. There will be a lot of weight gain with this, he says. I shudder, since I gained at least 25 lbs on nardil within 3 months, and I am already very heavy, in large part due to med trials (no pun intended).
Well, you choose, he says.
I feel pressured. I choose the vicodin, because IF I have ECT, he tells me that I will have to go off of neurontin and klonopin because they are anti-convulsants. Just what a nervous, chain smoking woman needs to hear! And yet I know that if I am ever going to be able to comprehend my reading in school, (which I took medical leave from after week 3) I am going to have to 86 the neurontin. It turns me into a moron. That is one of the reasons I took medical leave. No comprendo nada, get it???
Now I am second-guessing my decision to just go with the vicodin because I will become addicted eventually to it and then I will be in more trouble!
Does geodon produce less akathesia than abilify? Is it worth it to give parnate a try with a dr, who doesn't know much about it?
I know the obvious answer is change doctors! But I am really kind of afraid to drive long distances at this time, in the snow...
Besides, if I DO go for ECT, he is the one who makes a referral to someone he respects.Sorry this is so long and convoluted, but I would really appreciate help on any or all of these med issues.
Thank you,
Diane
poster:platinumbride
thread:729172
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070201/msgs/729172.html