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Re: ECT experience » Amadeus

Posted by blueberry on December 8, 2006, at 12:21:39

In reply to ECT experience, posted by Amadeus on December 8, 2006, at 11:23:09

ECT. Oh man. It brings back such terrifying memories. But I'll share. Keep in mind that I believe my bad experience was due to a doctor who mismanaged my case, not to ECT itself. But the memory loss...well, I'll get to that.

They say it takes 6 to 12 treatments, usually 12, at 3 per week.

My first 8 weren't doing anything except making me feel very weird and maybe even worse. I did not notice much memory loss, but I did notice some overall confusion and cognitive slowing. Somewhere between treatment 8 and 12 it kicked in. I felt very well. No depression. No anxiety. Perfectly comfortable in a crowd. Interested and motivated in life. It was nice.

The problem was that the doctor kept going at 3 times per week. I believe that was a mistake. As soon as a patient begins to respond I believe they should cut it back to twice a week and then once a week and then find whatever schedule it takes to maintain the goodness, which would probably vary from person to person. The only real side effect I noticed at treatment 12 was a completely dead sex life. It was gone. I was beginning to feel like something was too much. The goodness I felt didn't stop, it kept going higher, too high. I entered psychotic mania with significant agitation and restlessness. People said I had craziness in my eyes.

A mere 2 days after the last treatment I ended up with 6 police officers in my house and an ambulance ride to the hospital as I had crashed into such a deep dense depression I was crying hysterically and threatening suicide. It has been a slow crawl back, on my own, since then. My doctor refused to do anything else with me except ECT.

I asked where all the firewood in front of my house came from. I was told that I went and picked it up in my car. I have no recollection of that. I played guitar on stage for 3 church services. I have no recollection of that. I was pulled out of the congregation to play bass guitar when the regular bassist didn't show up. I have no recollection of that. Phone numbers. Forget it. They are all gone. My job. Forget it. I was like a new hire. No idea what to do. Even though I had been doing the job for 10 years. My new employer called me for my first day of work. I didn't even know I had applied for another job. And I could go on and on. Scary stuff. So now I find myself being trained in a new job where I have no idea how I ended up there.

ECT is supposedly very effective for both depression and mania. For me it brought out the worst of both, with only a 2 day wonderful normal period. Ever since then, the meds I have taken for a long time feel completely different, lots of side effects that never existed before, and they make my depression worse. They never did that before.

There is a 3 month period of my life that is completely utterly gone. No memory of it whatsoever.

The procedure itself wasn't too bad. Go to the hospital. They put several of us in our own draped cubicles, hooked up IVs to our arm veins, and when it was my turn they would wheel me to the work station. The doctor would look down at me and greet me and the next thing I knew I was at home.

I do not believe most cases go as bad as mine did. But it shows the potential is there for disaster.


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