Posted by Maxime on February 20, 2005, at 22:08:26
In reply to Re: It's almost time to go into the hospital » Maxime, posted by SLS on February 20, 2005, at 7:58:34
Scott, thanks for caring. It means a lot as I feel very alone in this world. I always have thoughts of hurting myself. It's all I think about. I self-injure sometimes but that is not the same as being suicidal.
My family does not support me. I no longer have friends who support me. The friends I have left I do not talk to them about all of this because I don't want to lose any more friends.
Stress. Yes, the stress of feeling hopeless all the time. That there is nothing out there that will ever help me and that I will have to live like this for the rest of my life. I'm dead inside. I function. But inside I am dead. It's scary.
Work is stressful because I work with people who have no social skills. I hate going to work everyday. I have to work so hard to achieve what I do (as oppose to when I am not depressed). No one knows. They wouldn't care anyway.
Maxime
> > I am almost "ripe". Going inpatient is around the corner for me. I can't cope any longer. I can't. I'm trying so hard to keep it together but I can't. I'm broken.
> >
> > I will know when it's time. I just hope I won't be turned away.
> >
> > Maxime
>
>
> Hi Maxime.
>
> I'm sorry that things have become so overwhelming for you. I know that whenever I reach these points, it seems like everything in the world is working against me. It is sometimes very difficult to select and identify specific issues that might be contributing to the crisis.
>
> Is there anything else you can share that might help ease your mind and allow you to feel less alone?
>
> You are fortunate to have the insight to know when it becomes necessary for you to go to the hospital. For the moment, are you having any thoughts of hurting yourself?
>
>
> - Scott
poster:Maxime
thread:460675
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050217/msgs/461070.html